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A pointless post about a pointless article

February 29, 2008

It’s late, I’m tired and nobody is reading, but boy is this awful.

Riding shotgun with LAPD

I did a ridealong once when I was in high school. All I remember is that the cop struck me as rather racist. Something about a prostitute, too.

Head out for a night on the streets with Los Altos Police Sgt. Scott McCrossin, and you’ll be prepared for almost anything.

I doubt this is this case, but I trust you’ll show us with some good expository writing.

There’s a riot helmet and gas mask in his trunk. He has books on case law and hazardous materials at the ready, along with a Spanish/English dictionary and detailed maps compiled by the fire department. For quiet moments in the night, the policeman’s pleasure reading: an industry SWAT magazine. But McCrossin’s No. 1 tool, used much more than the AR-15 strapped behind the driver’s seat, is a beefy flashlight. He deploys it through the night on parked cars, construction sites and suspects on the city’s dark streets.

Things the officer appears to be prepared for:

  • a riot
  • a gassing
  • a legal argument
  • a Mexican
  • getting lost
  • doing nothing

Things Eliza Ridgway appears to be prepared for:

  • awkwardly watching the officer encounter the things on the above list.

In daylight, Los Altos police often chat with residents taking in sun outside the Sub-Acute Rehabilitation Center, neighbors walking dogs and business owners. At night, it’s a different story. That’s when the illicit and forgotten – the homeless, drug abusers, burglars and vandals – tend to come out.

“The illicit and forgotten” = the homeless? I hope that was a typo.

[Bunch of truly, stunningly boring stuff happens]

“All of your reports need to be nice and perfect here,” Langone said, speaking ruefully of what a vocal and close watch the community keeps on the department.

I’m too sleep-deprived to understand sarcasm right now, let alone be able to do it myself. So, rather than try to write something clever, I’ll just say that I still can’t figure where anybody would get the idea that Los Altos keeps a “vocal and close watch” on the police department. If that were the case, shouldn’t more people (perhaps the local newspaper) have opposed the department’s effort to enact an unconstitutional law banning day workers and lemonade stands from the city’s streets?

Am I missing something?

4 Comments leave one →
  1. Anonymous permalink
    February 29, 2008 10:23 am

    >It’s late, I’m tired and nobody is >reading, but boy is this awful.

    >Am I missing something?

    You have readers, even when it’s late and you’re tired.

  2. Koland permalink
    February 29, 2008 6:37 pm

    Great article Jon. This is the NOE we love.
    By the way, you didn’t need to post an anonymous comment reassuring yourself.

  3. miss mischief permalink
    March 1, 2008 1:28 am

    I found this sentence particularly reassuring: “Because some civilians – and reporters – monitor police scanners, the top officers travel with department cell phones for sensitive calls.” It’s nice to know they’re keeping the big crimes off the air waves, what with all those officer involved shootings happening in Los Altos.
    I take comfort in knowing that all you need to do to get out of a speeding ticket is to just get a bad haircut.

  4. Anonymous permalink
    March 3, 2008 3:11 am

    thanks for writing about this. the article is pointless.

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